I'm having a horrible migraine and I cant sleep. So I decided to blog about my new phone and other rants before I bore myself with my topic.
I got this phone last week!!! Well this is not my phone, as I cant take a picture of my phone. But it's the exact same model! I named it Shoashums. It's such a good phone. Honestly, when I had a pda it wasnt of much use to me but this little smartass is like my personal assistant. She is my alarm clock, my camera, my mp3 player, my reminder, my bible, my bible plan, my entertainment, my everything. At some point I dont even bother to turn the computer on because I can just use my phone to do it. Totally love my phone.
I have so much to do tomorrow I dont even know where to start. I have tonnes of work for the next couple months so yes, the migraine is a sign I'm thinking way out of my limits and I need to chill. I dont know how dean list students do it. I can barely make it to 2.0. Maybe I need a plan, and lay of the social networks a bit. The downside of having this phone is I get to Facebook all the time!
My dad gave me $10 for February. I dunno how they think I can manage with that much money =.=
Things between my parents are a little distant at the moment. Mostly because they are eyeing my loan money like vultures... I know it sounds harsh, but I'd like to use that money to get some nice things for myself. Like makeup, and clothes and shoes. Girly? Yes.. but I am at the stage where I want to look nice, taking care of myself, looking positive, having a positive attitude, and it's always nice to wake up and get dressed up and look nice for uni, coz well, I spend ALL day in uni and I practically have no life in Kampar, and it feels nice to look good in uni. You know...
Sometimes, I want to write a long letter to my parents, and introduce them to me, who I am, who I have become, what I like, what I dislike, basically like a cv, but then I realise unless they open their eyes and heart and see me, there's nothing I can do except wait and hope.
And I really miss my boyfriend. We havent been together for ages. But he knows who I am, he knows all my moves, all my likes, dislikes, even without me telling him. It's so much easier to love someone when you see them putting the same effort too. I made an effort with my parents. I let them in, I tell them my secrets, I listen to their complains, I put a effort to wear the clothes they like to see me in, I follow the horrendous diet plans they put me in, I tried. But they betrayed my trust, they belittle me, they blame me for their mistakes. All that. And so I decided, who wants such negativity? And yea, I'm keeping away from them. I feel like life is too short to go around in circles and regret and whine about every misfortune. It's ok to feel that way, but you cannot let yourself immerse in that sadness, or it will get to you. Trust me. It got to me.
So I'm just trying to keep a positive attitude about everything now. Its working for me. And yes now I'm sleepy... I think I bore myself. Tomorrow is a long day, as every day turns out to be. haha.
xoxo